William Damon

Our ultimate hope with this book is that it will validate efforts to improve moral choice and encourage moral commitment.

Although we recognize the role that gut responses can play, we reject extreme positions of biological determinism that characterize the entire human moral sense as driven by nonconscious responses.

When individuals are described as persons of integrity, this generally means that moral values and goals are central to who they are and, at least as important, it means that they don’t often rationalize their violations of those values in order to let themselves off the hook. The avoidance of rationalization (which we call inner truthfulness) is widely recognized as a central feature of strong moral character.

Benjamin Franklin wrote, ‘In reality, there is perhaps no one of our natural Passions so hard to subdue as pride. Disguise it, struggle with it, beat it down, stifle it, it is still alive... For even if I could conceive that I had completely overcome it, I should probably be proud of my Humility.’

This is a central thread of world wisdom throughout the ages. Fulfillment and peace of mind come not from trying to create the most attractive possible self but from taking the focus off the self: not thinking less of oneself, but thinking of oneself less.

How can I earn a living as a valued member of society and make a positive difference in the world? These are questions that, sooner or later, all young people must confront in order to make their most crucial life choices.

The case that I make throughout this book is that finding a clear purpose in life is essential for their achievement of happiness and satisfaction in life, and that doing so is a good deal harder than it should be in our present-day cultural environment.

We must recapture that longer and more enlightened view. As a revered international leader of an earlier era, Dag Hammarskjold, once said, ‘Only he who keeps his eyes fixed on the far horizon will find the right road.’ It is our responsibility as adults in this uncertain, confusing, and increasingly cynical time to provide the younger generation with far-horizon guidance.

Purpose endows a person with joy in good times and resilience in hard times, and this holds true all throughout life.

Critics have complained, rightly I believe, that our obsessive reliance on standardized test scores deters both teachers and students from concentrating on the real mission of schooling: developing a love of learning for learning’s sake—a love that will then lead to self-maintained learning throughout the lifespan.

From gratitude springs not only an enhanced appreciation for our own blessings but also a desire to pass such blessings along to others—the heart and soul of purpose.

Our study results convince me that anyone can find purpose and pursue it with rich benefit to themselves and others. But, as I have pointed out, support is vital along the way.

Everything we say and do around children registers. A child’s character is formed through a succession of moment-by-moment communications and interactions with the people closest to them, and even something as simple as regularly expressing a positive outlook on life can make a significant difference.

Our ability to learn relies on open-mindedness, curiosity, humility, and the willingness to take the risk of finding out something that may upset our emotional balance, at least temporarily.

The master concept driving my professional work over the past two decades is purpose. ... Finding purpose bestows energy, motivation, resilience, and commitment to causes beyond the self. It can turn aimless, drifting, adolescents into focused and high-achieving adults.

The theory of narrative identity posits that identity formation can be promoted by creating a life story that integrates past and present experiences with future aspirations.

Like everyone else in the world, I am a complex individual. ... Consequently, I am not destined to be affected by any particular trend found in the general population.

A deliberate and intentional approach to life stories... offers a way to affirm our life experiences rather than rue or despair them.

I was embarking on a serious quest, and I knew I would not get very far if I approached it casually or haphazardly.

Purpose is an active commitment to accomplish aims that are both meaningful to the self and of consequence to the world beyond the self.

Among other things, it’s confirmed for me the adaptability of the human spirit. Each of us can find a way, a unique and individual way. In some instances, we start by dealing the hand ourselves; in others, we play whatever cards we’ve been dealt. In all cases, the choices we make define our destinies.