In our last few +1s (here, here, and here), we talked about how Emerson and I are having fun cultivating his ability to win or learn by embracing the fact that, although losing sucks, it’s also, when you do it right, EXCITING!
Thank you, Chess Grandmaster Maurice Ashley and Basketball Grandmaster, Kobe Bryant, for the wisdom.
Right before we took that detour, we were talking about Dr. Nate Zinsser’s GREAT book, The Confident Mind.
As you may recall, we defined confidence as having the CERTAINTY that you have what it takes to dominate whatever it is you’re about to do.
To be precise and to directly quote Dr. Z‘s “operating definition of confidence (one that will actually help you perform well), is this: a sense of certainty about your ability, which allows you to bypass conscious thought and execute unconsciously.”
Of course, that intense trust/certainty doesn’t *guarantee* you will crush it in any given situation.
But…
NOT having the confidence that you can and will crush it DOES guarantee that you will NOT show up as your absolute best.
You might do fine and even great.
But…
You need to have that INTENSE TRUST/ CERTAINTY in yourself (aka CONFIDENCE!) if you want to see what you’re REALLY capable of doing.
Now…
You could say that we never stopped talking about how to forge a confident mind as we took that detour to chat about Emerson’s recent chess performance and how we used it as fuel for his next-level growth.
And…
You’d be right.
We were forging his (and YOUR and your kids’ and colleagues’!) confident mind(s) as we did that work.
And…
It’s time to get back to some wisdom from Dr. Zinsser’s book.
Dr. Z tells us that, if we want confidence, we need to build our “psychological bank account.”
As he puts it: “Once you understand that every thought and every memory you have about your sport or your profession is affecting your ongoing sense of certainty, you can decide to either take command of how you think or give this command over to the ups and downs, the highs and lows of life.”
He continues by saying: “Taking this command over the input into your personal mental bank account will create for yourself an advantage over all those who don’t. The ability to do this—to selectively interpret your personal experience so that you mentally retain and benefit from experiences of success, progress, and effort, while simultaneously mentally releasing or restructuring experiences of setbacks and difficulties is in all of us. It is the primary mental skill upon which the First Victory is won.”
Dr. Z tells us that there are, essentially, THREE ways to do that.
We need to mine our PAST for positive memories, create positive moments in the PRESENT, and create a powerful vision for the FUTURE.
Each time we do that, we’re making deposits into our confidence bank account such that, on game day (whatever that means for each of us!), we KNOW we have what it takes to dominate.
Enter: The Confident Mind.
Aka… “a sense of certainty about your ability, which allows you to bypass conscious thought and execute unconsciously.”
We’ll chat about each of those time horizons (the PAST, the PRESENT, and the FUTURE) and how to make deposits in each in our next few +1s.
Today I want to talk about the FOUNDATION of our bank.
You know what it is?
It’s accepting that there ARE NO PERFECT HUMAN BEINGS (and/or performances) along with the fact that you and I won’t be the first to achieve that impossible feat.
Great, CONFIDENT performers KNOW that they aren’t and don’t need to be perfect.
Do you?
Unlock this Heroic +1 (and over 1,000 more)!
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