Out of Sight, In the Moment #32
How to deepen your connections every day.
Here’s a simple but powerful truth: your phone is a distraction even when you’re not using it.
Studies show that having your phone visible during a conversation—even if it’s face down and silent—diminishes the quality of connection.
Why is that? Because its mere presence signals to the other person that your attention is divided, even if you’re unaware of it. Part of your attention is going there.
And when your attention is divided, your connection suffers.
This is why your Heroic Elite daily target to spend phone-free time with loved ones is non-negotiable. It’s not just a nice-to-have—it’s a fundamental practice for building deeper, more meaningful relationships.
The Science of Phone-Free Connection
1. Diminished Connection: A study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships found that the presence of a phone during conversations can lead to lower empathy and reduced feelings of closeness.
2. Distracted Attention: Phones pull your focus—even when you’re not actively using them—thanks to the psychological phenomenon called “attention residue.”
3. Better Bonds: Putting your phone away improves active listening, empathy, and shared experiences, all of which strengthen your relationships.
In a world dominated by screens, going phone-free is a powerful way to show your loved ones they matter most.
The Heroic Elite Mindset
At Heroic Elite, we don’t settle for superficial connection. We prioritize presence and love by creating boundaries that strengthen our relationships.
Spending quality, phone-free time with loved ones is one of the 10 +1 Heroic Elite daily targets for a reason. It’s a practice that not only deepens your connections but also reinforces your values.
When you’re with someone, be with them fully.
Action for Today
Commit to spending phone-free time with a loved one or friend today. Here’s how:
1. Out of Sight, Out of Touch: Put your phone in another room or leave it in the car during meals or conversations.
2. Be Fully Present: Focus on listening, engaging, and sharing without distraction.
3. Reflect: How did it feel to give your full attention to someone you care about?
Presence is the greatest gift you can give. Let’s practice it today.
P.S. For more on this, check out the Philosopher’s Notes on:
- Digital Minimalism by Cal Newport
- Irresistible by Adam Alter
- The Distraction Addiction by Alex Soojung-Kim Pang
This Heroic Elite Daily Inspired by:

Digital Minimalism
by Cal Newport